Should We Talk About Money While Dating?

Talking about money with someone you are starting a relationship with can feel taboo. However, these conversations can help you find a person that aligns with your values and helps you build mutual respect.

Starting the conversation early in a relationship can make it less awkward later. It can also be a revealing part of the getting-to-know-you stage. Start casual with simple questions like, "Are you saving up for anything?" or "What do you like to spend your fun money on?" How a person manages and uses their money can help you see a clearer picture of what they are interested in, future plans, and if you have shared values. 

As your relationship progresses, keep money as a topic of conversation. The more you talk about it, the more comfortable you will both be discussing finances. There may be opportunities to connect over the subject. Share what you learned about money when growing up or talk about how your family dealt with money. Even work together towards a financial goal, like a weekend getaway.

As the relationship  continues and grows deeper, the conversations about money should go deeper as well. If you are considering bringing your individual lives together, then money may become a shared resource and you both need to be aligned on how it is managed. You should discuss what your current financial situation looks like including debt, credit scores, spending habits, short-term, and long-term goals.

Talking about money can bring up a lot of emotions. If your partner makes you feel devalued during the conversation or either of you become hostile or shuts down, these can be red flags. If you are having healthy and productive conversations about money from the beginning, you know you have found a partner in reaching financial goals together and building a life with security.

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(February 2025)